Everyone loves a good joke, but..

Everyone loves a good joke. I'm no exception. But considering the great amount of jokes our MPs and other big shots are generating out of their mouths these days, we don't even need to look for new ones to keep us amused. But then some like the submarine that don't dive jokes suddenly become a reason for us to be worried when the lame excuses why they don't come from a minister himself. Now, that's no joke.

Now we can see why in the darkest days when Poland was still struggling behind the iron curtain, the Polish used to joke a lot, especially about themselves, their living conditions, their daily struggles and their politicians. I was trying to find some of those gems I used to read, but they seem to evade me. Maybe now that the Polish are finally free of the oppression they simply let those jokes dissipate and fade away.

Can we hope for the same miracle to happen to us and our tragic/comic situation here in our bolehland?

Meanwhile, here's to share with you the results of my search for jokes to keep my spirits up while watching the real tragic-comedy going on...

Mother nature must be taking a nap...

It seems my little Ciku Tree is coming along fine, but I just wonder why it's taking forever even to lift the teeny weeny seed shell off the ground.

After we've seen how fast bean sprouts get off and go, this is like watching a slug taking off after hearing the starter's gun. Yeah, not exactly reaching eagerly for the sky.


Mother Nature must be having a nap over this one.

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Update: It's standing up this morning! Straightened itself. That's more like it!


It looks like some golfer stuck his club in here...

Too hot to handle

I heard a certain farming community in Australia have annual chilli growing competitions. One of the contests was to determine who can come out with the hottest chilli in the state.

A Malaysian wife of an Australian friend heard about the competition and was curious enough to want to know how hot were the chillies they could cultivate. She was sceptical because she thought the teeny-weeny dynamite chilli padi from home was supposed to be the hottest thing this side of the globe and nothing can beat its kick.

The hubby was quietly amused but he managed to grab a handful of the best samples after the competition was over and gave them to the wife. "Here honey, try these and let's hear your verdict."

The wife, following her favorite rice cooking method from home decided to throw some of the chillis into the pot of rice she was cooking.

The result: She had to throw away the whole pot of rice. Nobody in the family could eat it. It was too hot.

Hey! Not over my head!

Accidents won't be called 'accidents' if we can foresee them. But sometimes with a little care and common sense we can prevent accidents from happening.

If you're running a restaurant and hire waiters and waitresses to serve customers, I'm sure some of the things you train your workers to do or not to do should come as a matter of priority.

Yes, your waiters' and waitresses' job scope is to serve customers. But I would put certain safety procedures as a major requirement. Along with customer service skills, your people should be well trained to safeguard customers as well as themselves while performing their duties, whether or not your restaurant subscribe to the ISO 14000 certification. It could also prevent litigation or compensation costs.

The following episode could have been a potential disaster if my nephew had not been watching his baby. Never mind that an accident didn't happen. Rather, it was prevented from happening. We could all take that as a lesson learnt.

We were having dinner at a club restaurant and nephew requested for some hot water. The waiter came over with a jug and stood behind the baby who was sitting quietly on his baby chair. Someone handed him a glass. Noticing that the waiter was about to pour the hot water into the glass, right over the baby's head, nephew quickly shielded the baby's head with his hands at the same time giving the waiter an earful. That was the first time I saw my nephew lose his cool.

I'm not sure if he took the case to the captain or supervisor. Of course, the argument would have been, 'Well, nothing happened, right?' So, what's the complaint?' That's normal reaction. Nothing went wrong, so no case.

But I certainly hope that waiter learned an important lesson: Never transfer anything from one container to another over someone's head. And a baby is certainly someone important.

Eat for Charity - Yeah, that's right....

Dine for Haiti

Damansara Village Steamboat
is organising a fund raising event for the victims of the devastating earthquake in
Haiti.

Event:
Dine for Haiti. Charity dinner event.

Date/time:

Friday, February 5, 2010. From 5.30pm to 11.30 pm

Venue:

Damansara Village Steamboat Restaurant
1067, Jalan Jenjarum, Kg. Sg. Kayu Ara, off Jalan SS23/10, 47400 Petaling Jaya.
Tel: 03 7803 1832.
GPS coordinates: Latitude: 3° 7'26.64"N Longitude: 101°36'46.71"E


* Come and dine on our fresh, live sea-food with our secret recipe herbal soup steamboat. All items on menu at normal prices.
* Spot the celebrities.
* Participate in Celebrity Item Auctions.
* Photograph with the celebrities.

ALL proceeds go to the Haiti earthquake victims.

This event will not be publicised in the mainstream media. It is NOT an event to generate publicity for Damansara Village Steamboat Restaurant. It is a simple opportunity to give something back to fellow human beings in need. Please help to spread the word about this event through your blogs, Facebook, Twitter, coffee morning groups....

CELEBRITY PARTICIPATION.

List of celebrities participating in the event (subject to change without notice:-

1: Yasmin Yusuff, radio deejay, host, former Ms. Malaysia/Universe
2. Hans Isaac, actor, producer
3. Amber Chia, super model, actor, brand ambassador
4. Daphne Iking, TV host, actor
5. Andrea Fonseka TV host, former Ms. Malaysia/Universe
6. Ben Ibrahim, TV host

Depressing things to read

I was reading this crappy piece of opinion.

Then I read some historical, political and economic analysis.

After that I read what this ice-cream seller had to say.

All are depressing things to read about and some parts even confusing to say the least.

I think the way my friend the 'paper-wrapper' thinks, makes the most sense to me. Thanks, kawan. Whatever you've got under your tudung saji, you've made all these things so simple to digest.

The Replacement

One of my ex-bosses had a little saying while we watched some workers cut down a tree to put up a building extension: "It takes 15 bloody long years to get a tree to its full height, but it takes only 15 minutes to cut it down!"

While our mango tree slowly withers away, I'm making preparations for its replacement. After all, it takes years for a tree to grow to its full potential, so I need to start early. But it seems my little replacement, the ciku seed, is taking its own sweet time to germinate. Looks like it's going to take some effort on my part to nurture it. The 'parents' come all the way from Kuala Selangor.

After several days seeing nothing emerging I got worried, until I noticed a little crack in one of the seeds that got 'floated' above the soil. Then a day later another of the seeds surfaced and 'anchored' itself into the soil.


Knowing we won't be around to water it, we took it along on our travels. (The story is: We're staying at brother-in-law's. While wife takes care of the cooking and cleaning in the house, I take over some of the son's errands, while he recuperates for a month in hospital of some internal ailment. On top of that, I have an assignment to keep track of).

I covered the little pots with a plastic netting and left them in a corner in their garden. That night, their dogs messed up the pots and chewed the netting to pieces. Fortunately, one of the seedlings survived. Then another seed broke through the surface of the soil in the 2nd pot.



Stick around... especially you tree lovers.