Monday, October 10, 2011

The Old Rooster

A farmer went out one day and bought a brand new stud rooster for his hen house. The young rooster walked over to the old rooster and said  "Ok, old fellow, time to retire."

The old rooster said, "You can't handle all these chickens....look at what it did to me!"

The young rooster replied, "Now, don't give me a hassle about this. Time for the old to step aside and the young to take over, so take a hike."

The old rooster says, "Aw, c'mon.....just let me have the two old hens over in the corner. I won't bother you."

The young rooster said, "Scram! Beat it! You're washed up! I'm taking over!"

So, the old rooster thought for a moment and then said to the young rooster, "I'll tell you what, young fellow, I'll have a race with you around the farmhouse. Whoever wins the race gets domain of the chicken house."

The young rooster said, "You know I'm going to beat you, old man, just to be fair, I'm even going to give you a head start."  They lined up in back of the farm house, got a chicken to cluck "Go!" and the old rooster took off running. 

A short while later the young rooster took off after him.  They went round the front of the farm house and the young rooster was only about a few paces behind the old rooster and gaining fast. 

The farmer, sitting on the porch, looked up, saw what was going on, grabed his shotgun and promptly shot the young rooster.  "Dammit!  he said, "That was the third gay rooster I bought this week!"

Moral of the story:  Don't play-play with old roosters.

Sunday, October 9, 2011

To All those Born in 1940's, 50's , 60's & early '70s...

NOTE:  This message (with lots of modifications) has been around as far back as my blogging mind can remember....
First, we survived with mothers who had no maids. They cooked/ cleaned while taking care of us at the same time.
They took aspirin, candy floss, fizzy drinks, shaved ice with syrups and diabetes was rare. Salt added to Pepsi or Coke was remedy for fever.
We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets.
As children, we would ride with our parents on bicycles/ motorcycles for 2 or 3.  Richer ones in cars with no seat belts or air bags.
Riding in the back of a private taxi was a special treat.
We drank water from the tap and NOT from a bottle.
We would spend hours on the fields under bright sunlight flying our kites, without worrying about the UV rays which never seemed to affect us.
We went to the jungle to catch spiders without worries of Aedes mosquitoes.
With mere 5 pebbles (stones) would be a endless game. With a ball (tennis ball best) we boys would run like crazy for hours.
We caught guppies in drains / canals and when it rained,  we swam there.
We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually worried about being unhygienic.
We ate salty, very sweet & oily food, candies, bread and real butter and drank very sweet soft sweet coffee/ tea, ice kacang, but we weren't overweight because.......
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, till street lights came on.
No one was able to reach us all day.WE DID NOT HAVE HANDPHONE S TO BUG US. And we were O.K. AND WE WERE SAFE.
We would spend hours repairing our old bicycles and wooden scooters out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.
We did no t have Playstations, X-boxes, Nintendo's, multiple channels on cable TV, DVD movies, no surround sound, no phones, no personal computers, no Internet. WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!
We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and we still continued the stunts.
We never had birthdays parties till we were 21
We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and just yelled for them!
The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!
Yet this generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!
The past 40 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.
We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned ..
And YOU are one of them!
You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the government 'regulated' our lives for our own good.
And while you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave their parents were.
P/S: -The big  font used is because of Long-sightedness or hyperopia at our  age.


I discovered this cutting in one of my old books... and I became lost in it... 

A Poem by Cecil Rajendra
Published in the Sunday Star, July 5, 1981

* for Ong Soo Keat

Part I

By the waters of the Tembeling
where samba deer
and seladang undisturbed
roam where the buffalo
tapir and the wild boar play...

By the waters of the Tembeling
where drongo
and hornbill criss-cross skies
where bamboo
genuflect to kiss the river...

By the waters of the Tembeling
my mind roamed
across our gauche and grace-
less cities-
their emissaries of greed
and destruction;
a flotilla of timber lorries.

And by the waters
of the Tembeling
I sat down and wept.

Part II

No piranha menace
the waters
of the Tembeling
but sharks
with buzz-saw teeth
are everywhere...

As the mist lifted off
Bukit Teresek
I saw a once virgin
jungle in dishabille:
torn, ravished, bruised
Used by gangs
of loggers, she lay in
tatters, while
lascivious one-eyed
helicopters circled
overhead and ogled.

From her lacerated
side I watched
a stream of laterite
trickle to bloody
the waters of Tembeling

As the mist lifted off
Bukit Teresek
I heard the witches'
of chain-saw cutter
and cackle of bulldozer
the song of bulbul
and cricket.
I saw juggernauts in
every corner
set about dismantling
our forest.

A cirrus of diesel
hovered like a vulture
waiting to take over
this land and its people.

No piranha menace
the waters
of the Tembeling
but sharks
with buzz-saw teeth
are everywhere...

Whither My Dreams?

I broke some chains
from around my heart
to find my dreams intact
but there's nothing in it

only broken pieces
which don't match
nor fit together
to form an image

this emptiness
gets more hollow
each time I listen to it
I can hear no echoes
I can't see any reflections

the hunger pangs
are harder to bear
than those of an empty belly

and lord, it's dark in there

Saturday, October 8, 2011

Old Tea Pot

While washing up the coffee pot this morning an old story came to mind.

On a five-foot-way of good old Penang's Heritage enclave, some 'uncles' were having a leisurely tea session when who should walk by but an 'angmoh' tourist toting a back pack.  He was looking high and low taking in every little detail of the quaint scenery.

As he got close to where the old uncles were seated, he paused and stared at an old and brown-stained tea pot sitting on a tray, from which one of the uncles occasionally poured tea for his friends.  He was so strangely attracted by the tea pot that he inquired on the spot as to whether the owner was willing to sell it.

Surprise gave way to greed as the old guy contemplated making some good money out of this strange angmoh who seemed deranged enough to want to buy an old and well-used teapot, one which he can get from any crockery shop in town for a pittance.

He said he was willing to part with this 'heirloom' for $200.

The tourist haggled for a lesser amount.  They finally settled at a price of $150.  The old man said for him to come back in an hour's time so that he and his friends can finish their tea session.  The tourist said OK, paid him a deposit for the pot and went his way promising to be back later to collect his purchase.

When he came back later he was shown a sparkling clean tea pot.  The old man had given the gem a good scrubbing and polishing job and felt mighty proud of it too.  The shiny thing almost looked new.  But to his surprise and dismay, the 'angmoh' refused to accept it as the pot he had paid the deposit for.

'No, no no...' he said.  'That's not the teapot I wanted.  The one I wanted was a real antique and brown in color with tea-stains all over.  I don't want one that is cleaned and polished!  It's of no value to me.  Now give me the one I wanted or give me back my deposit!'

The old guy reluctantly returned his deposit.

Hence, I'm told, to this day those old uncle tea drinkers don't polish their teapots.  They just throw out the used tea leaves and rinse them out.

This Old Mango Tree

This amazing mango tree
will not just lay down
nor whither off 
and die 
without trying to live
yet another season

another burst of new leaves
fresh blooms
slowly turning into fruits

still providing oxygen
and still offer 
what limited shade 
it could give
for some random cars 
to park beside

it still stands 
and steady
never willing 
to give up...

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

A Geeky Rat

A geeky rat hitched a ride in my car to the shop this afternoon. Maybe he's looking for some spares to upgrade his PC home...

On the way back after installing a CPU for a customer located on the east side of town, I dropped by at another client's place to pick up two more 'stalled' PCs.

The place was rigged up like an ultra-modern office with wall-to-wall carpeting.  I had to leave my shoes outside the glass doors.  They told me those 2 units just couldn't turn on.  One of them was still under a desk in dark and lonely cubicle.  I signed off the paperwork, I picked up the CPUs and loaded them into the boot of the Myvi.

After I'd reached the shop and parked the car, I retrieved one of the CPUs and stepped up to the walk-way in front of the shop.  Before I could reach the door, a large rat jumped out of the CPU I was holding and scooted off before I could say, 'Rats!'.

He probably just wanted to go shopping at Tesco nearby and needed a free ride.  But, hey!  He went in the wrong direction! 

I stared after it for a moment.  Then I looked at the casing and noticed wet patches on the side.  I put down the thing and went back to the car.  Sure enough, there were wet spots in the boot.  He pissed in my car!!!

I was lucky I stored the PCs in the boot, not on the back seat.  And double lucky for me the Myvi's boot came with a large shallow plastic tray.  All i had to do was to pull it out and give it a good wash.

Note to self:  Next time don't just pick up a CPU and load it into the car without checking for stowaways.  They can be infested not just with viruses and worms, you can't be sure there are no rats or snakes nesting in them.  Urgh!!!