Friday, April 15, 2016

She forgot, but it doesn't matter.

I remember the evening when I was scrolling through my Facebook page.  She came by and saw me reading my birthday greetings.

'Oh, I forgot!'  She exclaimed.

She'd already got all the ingredients to cook me something special.  But she forgot today was the day.

I patted her hand and said, 'It's no big deal.  You've done a lot taking care of me the last few months and helped me deal with the pain.  I'm getting stronger now and I'm happy with my life.'

No, I didn't say exactly those words.  I said far less than that.  But those words came from my heart.  And I was referring to the major painful experience and operation I underwent and the post operation healing process that she bore through with me.

For that I am thankful.

About Toxic People.

Toxic people are indeed worse than poisonous chemicals.

I once worked in a factory making battery separators.  We had to work with Concentrated Sulfuric Acid, Phenol and Formalin.  We dealt with them on a day to day basis.  But none of these chemicals scared me.  I was very careful when handling them.  Sometimes I even did away with wearing protective gear.  And as a direct result, get into minor accidents but none caused me any permanent scars; physically or mentally.

There were toxic fumes when the chemicals were processed in a reactor. After that pulp paper was dipped into the chemical and then had to go through a high temperature dryer.  More toxic fumes were released into the air.

In the next process an adhesive was applied to the pulp paper.  This adhesive contained a solvent called Toluene.  Kids could get a 'high' sniffing this chemical which is also commonly used in glue for patching bicycle tires.  Then a piece of glass-mat is stuck on the pulp paper.

When the glue is dried the product is cut into smaller pieces.  During the cutting, microscopic pieces of glass fiber would fly into the air.

There you are; awful pungent smell of poisonous chemicals, corrosive fluids, and hot, dusty, itchy atmosphere.  But none of these distressed me more than the toxic being that walked on two legs.

And in the end it was his toxicity that caused me to walk away from that job.

Thursday, March 31, 2016

A Pain In The Neck - The Last Resort




December 2014.
I was reading in my rattan ‘easy-chair’.  When I got up I felt this nagging pain in the old spot.  Within a few minutes it got worse and I still thought it was an ordinary pain-in-the-neck problem because I found it hard to turn my head to the right.

A week later (19-12-2014) and still feeling pain, I went to check with a GP.  He gave me some medication.  That finished.  The stiff-neck problem went away.  But the nagging nerve pain that went down to my last 2 fingers came more and more occasionally.  By end of January I was already feeling depressive.  It was getting worse. That pesky problem from ten years ago was back to haunt me.

I called the office of my former Chiropractor who has since moved to E-Gate.  The reception gave me an appointment for 4th March, 2015.  I said I don’t know if I can last that long.  She cheerily said if there’s anyone wishing to cancel their appointment, she’d call me.  I haven’t heard from her yet.  I tried searching on line for another chiropractor in my area with little success.

Days later when there was no other option I asked neighbor the contact number for the Chinese physician he was visiting regularly.  But I had doubts about whether he can help my case.  On the morning when I was supposed to drive over to Penang to see him I changed my mind.  I searched again for another chiropractor.  And I found one in Queensbay.

After the first treatment I felt I was on the right track.  4 treatments later I feel much healthier.  

But it was not to be.  Even though I finally went back to my former chiropractor I realized my neck condition had deteriorated to such an extent that it was beyond fixing by alternative means...
 



2016-01-07
After today’s chiropractic session I didn’t feel much relief.  It seems the tension is rebuilding in my neck.

2016-01-10
Sunday.  I felt the pain was getting too intense.  I called my Chiropractor.  Nobody answered.  I sent a message to him via Facebook messenger.  Surprisingly he responded.  But he was in KL.  He told me to see his partner.  I told him I couldn’t lift my head.  He told me to get pain-killer.  I called my bro-in-law and requested his help to send me to chiropractor tomorrow.  I knew I couldn’t drive anymore.  It was too risky.

2016-01-11
With my head tilted to the left I went to E Gate, Penang.  We arrived too early, so we had to wait.  The chiropractor tried to fix my neck.  She took extra effort and went through all the procedures.  But the pain remained.  I still had to keep my head tilted to relief the pain.  She arranged for another appointment for tomorrow.  On the way home I told bro-in-law I think the time has come for a decision to go for surgery.  I was still hesitating, still doubtful.

That afternoon the heat in the house was horrendous, especially in our dining area.  It was like an oven.  The heat was coming from the air well as the roof had only one layer of corrugated asbestos sheeting.  The on-going El Nino phenomenon added more discomfort to my condition.  At other times it didn’t seem so hot.  The pain went from bad to worse.  I tried lying down on the cool floor.  No relief there.  I went into our children’s room and turned on the air-conditioning.  I slept all afternoon with ice-pack pressed against my neck.

2016-01-12
I had slept all night (I mean, I tried to sleep) on my left side without a pillow, keeping my head tilted in such a way that it is positioned lower than my shoulder.   It was the last position that I could maintain to escape the torture.  When morning came, I tried getting up.  I felt hopeless.  I realized the time has come.  There’s no more choice but to go for the operation, in spite of what everybody and the medium at the temple said.  I’ve reached the last resort.  I told my wife my decision.  I got her to call her sister and to prepare ice-packs.

They took me to the SP General Hospital.  Sis-in-law thought she could pull some strings and get a doctor to give me a pain-killer shot or something.  No such luck.  There was no friendly, familiar doctor around that she knew from her nursing days.  The emergency room looked like a morning market in the afternoon.  There was no sense of urgency and no signs of urgency.   After a while I was called in to see a young woman whom we thought was a doctor.  She asked a few routine questions and then told us to wait.  She was probably only an intern.

I lay sideways on a row of plastic chairs.  A Hospital Assistant passing by grabbed a blanket from a nearby wheel-chair and gave it to me telling me to place it under my head.  It was thoughtful of him, but it was of no help.  I was trying to keep my head lower than my body while lying on my side.  I shoved part of the blanket under my shoulder instead.

I told sis-in-law to call my nephew, a radiologist at LGL Hospital, Penang, to ask him if Dr Kazem was in.  Yes, he was there on duty and Dr Kazem was also present.  I said let’s go.  I got into the back behind the driver’s seat so that I could partly lie down on my left side with my wife on the far left of the seat.  We kept changing ice-packs.  Along the way some of the ice had melted.  But the cold wet towels were better than nothing. 

I began to think of other things to dissociate myself from my predicament.   I thought:  If only I had a guardian angel.  I then realized I already have one.  My mother-in-law’s face appeared in my mind.  She’s long gone from this world of turmoil and suffering, but every time I was in trouble I thought of her.  Somehow I felt I was going to be alright.  She was seeing to it that I was being taken care of.  Everything was in place to save my day, like, here’s someone driving me to hospital.  I have a veteran nurse who knew what to do when we arrive.  I do not have a medical card, but I have someone to handle the financial requirements so that there’s no delay in checking in.  And there’s a relative right there in the hospital who was already alerted of my coming and who knew about the seriousness of my condition.  In fact, he’s the doctor who made out my MRI report.

Yet, it was the longest journey I’d ever taken from Sungai Petani to Penang.

When we arrived I walked into the E.R.  A gang of orderlies, nurses and (I assume) a doctor sprang into action.  One lady in blue uniform got me on a bed, checked my blood pressure and asked me lots of questions.   With sis-in-law as my spokesperson, I requested to see Dr Kazem.  I told the reception I consulted him 10 years ago and would like to refer to him again.  They spoke to the doctor and he instructed them to send me for an emergency MRI and wait for him.  That was good for another long painful wait and a nerve-racking endurance test inside the MRI machine.  But I took comfort in that a long overdue relief was coming soon.

Later in the afternoon the doctor came.  He tried something that seemed like humour.  He said, ‘Ten years ago I told you to have that operation but you ran away.  Why?’  I said I was afraid.  Everybody and some doctors told me the operation had only a 50:50 chance of success.  I didn’t want to mention the worst, but sis-in-law spelt it out.  If it was a failure, I could end up as a vegetable.  I couldn’t take a risk with that.

(On looking back, that was when my two older girls were in higher education while the youngest was still in secondary school.  If anything happened to me their future would be affected.   I decided I had no choice but to find an alternative.  And I did find an alternative although that was good for ten years.)

He then explained that there’s nothing to be afraid of now.  He does hundreds of such operations and no one has ever had any problems.  In fact, he said, your risk of facing a mishap on the Penang Bridge is greater than the failure of this operation itself.

After all the admittance procedures and necessary paper-work were done they wheeled me into my ward for the night.  It was to be another long wait until morning.

There was a nurses’ station right outside our 4-person ward.  Music, singing and some broadcasting was blaring away on a radio or TV.  Occasionally someone was yelling out in pain or some people were quarrelling among themselves.  Nurses discuss jobs, off-day activities, or something.  It was like a market place.  The door could not close by itself.  The automatic door-closer had broken down.  Every few minutes someone would enter the room for something or other.  My room-mate had endless visitors or talk loudly on his mobile phone to well-wishers.  That night I tried to sleep but it was impossible.  And it wasn’t just because of the noise.


At one point I managed to summon the nurse for an ice-pack.  She brought me one.  Before dawn arrived I had already used up several ice-packs.

2016-01-13
It was around 6.00am when a nurse entered the room and asked me if I could get up and take a shower or should she give me a bath.  Thrown off by that awkward question, I said I’ll try but I need another ice-pack.  She refused to oblige and ordered me to get the shower first.  Always being independent and doing things for myself, I wasn’t about to lie back and let a nurse do such personal things for me, as long as I could get up and walk, I could do it.  I forced myself up in spite of the terrible stabbing pain in the neck and headed for the bath-room.  I couldn’t locate anything that looked like a shower. 

The nurse said, ‘That’s not the shower room.  Shower-room’s next door!’  It sure was difficult trying to recognize things in semi-darkness while you’re viewing things from a horizontal angle.

I stripped and hastily showered (if you could describe wetting your head and body haphazardly, a shower), shivering, hissing and groaning in pain through my clenched teeth.  Quickly mopping off my wet head and body, I struggled to put on the operation gown.  That gown was made like an apron.  There was no covering for the back.  Only strings to tie it back.  It was as good as wearing nothing, so I struggled and managed to get my pants back on.  By the time I got back to my bedside the hissing and groaning noise level coming from me had increased by several more decibels.  The nurse told me to get back in bed. 

With her ‘job’ done, she left.  I lay down on the bed and let myself go, overwhelmed by the helplessness, frustration, more than a year-long of nagging pain and all that tension.  I let my tears flow and my nose to run into a towel I managed to grab.  My uncontrollable sobs came so loudly I thought that the racket should have woken up my room-mate by now.  But there seemed to be nothing coming from him.  Not even words of comfort or encouragement.  Here I was, feeling old, helpless and totally undignified, sobbing like a baby.  I felt like a mortally wounded survivor they somehow managed to salvage from a disaster site.  After a while of lying motionless, the pain subsided and I drifted off to sleep.

Later another nurse showed up and gave me 2 tablets I assumed to be pain-killers and allowed me a sip of water to get them down.  No more food or drink intake other than that, she said.

At around nine am, they wheeled me into an X-ray room.  Then a nurse gave me a shot I thought to be another pain-killer.  I looked around at what looked like factory store-room with grilles separating several enclosures.  There were production machines and workers moving about busy with their work.  I thought this was supposed to be a hospital…

A while later, someone said, ‘It’s over!’  (It was actually 4 ½ hours later.)  They wheeled me out of the operation room.  I noticed some familiar faces lined up outside the door but they were blurry and I couldn’t figure out who they were until I heard Chen Yee greeted me with a hand wave and a ‘Hi…!’  I opened my eyes again later and she was holding my hand and I managed to squeeze hers in response feeling grateful and comforted that things are going to get better from here on.   

When my lunch of fish porridge came I tried to get up and eat but I couldn’t manage.  My right hand wouldn’t cooperate.  There was a heavy blockage in my throat.  I found it hard to open my mouth and I couldn’t swallow.  And worse of all it was difficult to breathe.  Chen Yee fed me.  I forced myself a few mouthfuls drank some water and lay back exhausted.

Later when my wife and daughter heard about what happened the night before, Chen Yee managed to get me moved to another room.  This one I shared with a guy named Ganesh who was suffering from diabetes and some other renal problems.  He was a quiet chap who loves to watch TV thrillers (like Mission Impossible) around midnight with the full sound system.  After the movie ended, I told him if he wanted to watch some more TV, go ahead, but please turn down the sound.  He said, ‘No’.  And he went to sleep.

to be continued...

Thursday, September 17, 2015

Destiny? Who's holding the steering wheel?

My belief has always been that He's left it to us to decide what we do with our lives and how we want to live. If we need help, we ask. If we have faith we get our answers or the help we need. If we get greedy, or take the wrong path, then it's our own choice too. I still believe that's the way it works. How short our lives, where the road takes us or how long we live, that's our destiny...

Friday, July 31, 2015

Dance Series #5 - Anatomy Of An Online Scam


The internet is one huge minefield.  But there are lots of dummies wandering around blindly, taking the treacherous landscape for granted like it's their own backyard.  And I turned out to be one of them.

Fortunately I managed to come away without getting my limbs blown off.  Although ending up poorer by $100, I'm writing this off as payment for a very important lesson.

Here's how I walked right into a trap even though all the signs screamed at me "ALERT!!!  IT'S  A SCAM!!!  GET OUT!!!".

No way.  I've posted my paintings online for all these years and here's the first time someone is interested in my art enough to want to pay good money for it.  I was blinded.

With warning lights a-flashing, bells a-ringing, whistles a-blowing, buzzers going full blast, I still fell for it, all because my defenses went down too fast before reinforcements could come in.  There were too many glaring errors and signs that made me highly suspicious and I contacted PayPal to get them to clarify some of the emails I received, all I got were standard items and tick boxes to choose from.  I couldn't write in my questions because there was no blank box for me to write in.  I hate using the phones because I knew I'd only get to talk to machines.  

I tried asking my circle of friends but they're all online 'buyers', not 'sellers'.  I even cancelled the invoice that initiated the sale.  But somehow, I was like a proverbial deer being caught in the glare of a cyber-driver's headlights, knowing the danger but unable to run from it.

Finally when my mind was already busted due to doubts and worries and lack of sleep, (being a chronic worrier didn't help) I caved in because I'm too humanly decent.  I couldn't live with the idea that the other person (who hinted of being wheel-chair-bound, and who may be a genuine art buyer and perhaps turn out to be a potential long-term customer) 'loos' his money because I didn't keep up my end of the deal.  

My reinforcement troops from PayPal arrived 20 hours too late.


Fortunately Paypal volunteered to compensate me for half my losses.
 
I'm now writing this so that all fellow artists and crafts-people trying to sell their products online (who may be as dumb as me) can learn something from this and WALK away from a deal if it smells too good to be true.  

And please just keep walking and don't look back like what I did!!!

So, here's the anatomy report....  with myself as the pathologist.

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It started off with an email from www.Artbreak.com, the website where I post all my artworks up for sale.
 
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Artbreak Mailer Jul 15

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 Date: Wed, 15 Jul 2015 15:54:20 +0000
From: lianchyeteh@yahoo.com
To: james.william220@outlook.com
Subject: Dance Series #5

Hi Mr William,

Thanks for your interest in my painting.  I painted it recently (7th May 2015) and it's still unframed.  

Size: 42cm X 29.5cm
Medium: Color pencils & ink on cartridge paper.

I'm offering it for sale at USD$300 (mailing costs excluded).

Let me know of other details you need from me.
Please advice what country you're residing in.

regards,

LC Teh

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 To TLC
Thanks for your respond,can you framed it for me and get back to me with the final asking price after the frame and  including your pay invoice or paypal email so i can make the payment once..I have a private courier agent that will come for the pickup after payment has been made, so no shipping included. I'll need your name, the pickup address or location for the pick up.

Thanks


-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 Date: Thu, 16 Jul 2015 09:40:19 +0100
From: lianchyeteh@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: Dance Series #5
To: james.william220@outlook.com

Hi,

l am out of state this week.  I will take care of this when I get back next week.  Will contact you again with details.  Thanks.
LC Teh

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From:"william james"
Date:Thu, 16 Jul, 2015 at 19:34
Subject:Dance Series #5

Alright..email me back once you are around i will be waiting for your respond,Your Name?

Able God


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Date: Sun, 19 Jul 2015 00:39:01 +0100
From: lianchyeteh@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: Dance Series #5
To: james.william220@outlook.com

I am Teh Lian Chye, residing in Kedah, Malaysia. Where is your location?


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william james Jul 19

Well i locate in North Carolina,waiting for your respond

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July 24, 2015 - Friday.  I had the painting framed and packed it ready for shipment.  Then I created an invoice in my PayPal account.  What happened next, I let the correspondence tell the story....
 
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You've sent an invoice

Dear Lian-chye Teh,
Your invoice (0001) has just been sent to james.william220@outlook.com. Please note that it may take a few moments for this transaction to appear in your account.

Summary of your invoice

Sent tojames.william220@outlook.com

Sent fromLian-chye Teh
lianchyeteh@yahoo.com
Invoice number0001
Date payment is dueJul 24, 2015
Amount$338.00 USD
Yours sincerely,
PayPal

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
william james  Jul 24 at 4:13 PM
Sorry  i just got a mail from the shipping company that i will need to pay for the freighting fees before they can schedule pr-shipping/ pickup date,they charged $152 for the pick up and delivery, but the problem is they only accept Western union transfer as form of payment which is sent to their HQ in USA.as you are well aware of,I don't have access to my bank account online,but i have it attached to my Pay pal account,and That's why am using Pay-pal.most post offices have Western union section,will it be OK with you if I add the $152 to the amount I am transferring? and as soon as the money goes through you can help me make the Western union of the freighting fees through Western union money transfer? You are not obliged to help me, but i will indeed appreciate your help as I am a little incapacitated here.

Cheers.
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Lian-chye Teh ,

You have received a PayPal Payment of $590.00 USD from  James William ( james.william220@outlook.com)
A temporary hold has been placed on this transaction!
As mentioned in the receipt of Payment and as per New PayPal Payment policy, we have fully debited the total amount (above) from the buyer's account which includes the buyer's shipper's pick up fees.

In order to complete this transaction and get the funds approved in your account. We advice you go to nearest Western Union Office, and send the $152.00 USD to the Agent and send us a Scanned Copy/Photograph of your Money Transfer Control Number Receipt (in .JPG Format) with the Money Transfer Control Number (MTCN) in details.

NOTE: This is important as a security measure to ensure safety of this transaction.


Please, find below the name and address of the Transport Agent where the Funds would be sent via Money Transfer Control Number.

AGENT INFO :
Address:
Name; Bryan James Sullivan
State: Orange California
 Zip code:92867
United State.

Address Status:Confirmed












https://www.paypal.com/us/mrb/pal=KZAL42RVE3MQS 
Your Account will be credited accordingly upon the receipt of details requested. It should either be sent in JPG format or send type details as:
Sender's Name; Receiver's Name; MTCN; Amount Sent;

============================== ============================== ============================== ============================== ====
This administrative email was sent to lianchyeteh@yahoo.com  from Paypal.com S.à r.l.. Your account is registered on www.paypal.com As outlined in our User Agreement, PayPal will periodically send you information about site changes and enhancements. If you would like to receive this email in text format, change your notification preferences.

See our Privacy Policy and User Agreement if you have questions about PayPal communication policies.


Copyright © 2009-2015 PayPal Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Designated trademarks and brands are the property of their respective owners.
PayPal and the PayPal logo are registered trademarks or trademarks of PayPal


----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Dear  Lian-chye Teh,
                               Please be assured that you have a fund of $590.00 USD This fund has already been deducted from the buyer' account. We Request that you wire the excess fee TODAY to the agent's address since he/she has made payment to your PayPal account otherwise the payment will not be credited to the account specified (lianchyeteh@yahoo.com)
We need the wiring information (MTCN) For verification before the money could finally show in your account.
At the same time, we want to let you know that your transaction was done via our e-mail payments service, any inquiries and necessary information should be sent to us by directly reply to this message, because of the status of this transaction, it has not been passed on to our customer care phone service section,and all inquiries should be directed to this e-mail address as it is the one monitored for your transaction.

This is to reduce the high rate of fraudulent act and ensure that both buyers and sellers are satisfied, because it is all about our services to serve the worldwide, for the two parties. Please follow the protocol of the payment so that the money will be credited straight away into your account.

E-mail the MTCN to us as soon as possible.

Wiring information:


Name:Bryan James Sullivan
Orange California
Zip code:92867
UNITED STATE.

We hope to serving you better.
Stephanie Tilenius
Vice President & General Manager
PayPal Merchant Services


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 Date: Fri, 24 Jul 2015 11:24:33 +0000
From: lianchyeteh@yahoo.com
To: james.william220@outlook.com
Subject: Re: ABOUT TO MAKE THE PAYMENT ??

I just found out our govt levies a 6% GST (General services tax) on all money transfers thru Western Union.


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william james  Jul 24 at 10:32 PM

I  just made the payments of $590.00 USD into your account and Pay-pal emailed me confirming this. So please check your PayPal email address (lianchyeteh@yahoo.com) inbox,spam mail for the Pay Pal confirmation email. Pay-pal said that they would be holding the money i sent because of the excess payments that i made which was the money for pick up, i will need you to proceed and Wire the excess which is $152.00 USD to my pick up agent to enable them make a booking for the picked up of the item.Remember that you will wire the agent fee to them via Western Union Money transfer as that is there method of payment.So please do send the $152.00 USD through western union money transfer and use the remaining change of $50.00 USD as Western Union charges.You can easily Walk to the local post office or any outlet around you.After you have sent the money please get back to me asap with the western union details, the MTCN number which you will be given by western union after you have sent the money as well as the sender's name and address so i can forward it back to PayPal for your money to be put through or you can email it to PayPal directly,that is alright as well.

Here is my pick up agent's info that you will need to send the money to through western union money transfer:



Name:Bryan James Sullivan

Orange California
Zip code:92867
UNITED STATE.

I will need the address where the item will be picked up,as my pick up agent will contact you to book a pick up time after they have received payments but they will have to book a time that is convenient for you. Is really nice doing business with you

Best Regard...


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 Date: Fri, 24 Jul 2015 15:36:33 +0000
From: lianchyeteh@yahoo.com
To: james.william220@outlook.com
Subject: Re: PAYMENT MADE ???

I will do as required as soon as the banks open on Monday. It's Friday night over here right now.  But can you please instruct Pay-pal to release the $152 for the Western Union charges, otherwise I would be cashing out of my own pocket.  With our currency at it's lowest level, this calculates out to a big sum for me.  I don't mind paying for the GST charges first.  Thanks.
regards,
LC Teh

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william james  Jul 24 at 11:56 PM
Thanks for your respond.. i have already made all the payment into your account and the money have been deducted from my account OK.. so you have to go true Pay Pal instruction cos they want to protect both buyer and the seller,that is the reason,they said you have to follow there new rules before the money can be clear to your account,due to scam activities going on with PayPal, so you have to complete the transaction by Monday Morning and get back to us with the western union information so that Pay Pal can released the sum of $590 in your account immediately...

After the money has been send please get
 
MTCN number:
Sender's Name :
Sender's address:
Amount Send After western union charges

waiting for your fast respond...

Thanks..

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PayPal  Jul 25 at 8:17 PM